trembling knees.

I don’t know what it is about kisses, but no matter who is at the other side of it I always feel a rush going through my veins, and all though I don’t feel my knees tremble, it feels good. Or at least it did.
I don’t know what it is about kisses, but when his hand poses on my waist and his fingertips brush my cheek, I get this urgent need of smiling against his lips as to let him know the butterflies revolving through my ribcage, and all though I don’t feel my knees tremble, it feels good. Or at least it did.
I don’t know what it is about kisses, but I love to feel another pair of lips holding mine against him, keeping me still, forcing me to place my hands on his shoulders as if suddenly gravity wasn’t enough to keep my feet on the ground, and all though I don’t feel my knees tremble, it feels good. Or at least it did.
Because last night was one of those nights when you realize you don’t want to kiss some random guy. I remember feeling his nose brushing mine and there was no spark, no tinkle, no rush through my veins. I remember his smile against my mouth because he could finally have me in his embrace but my lips were flat, just waiting for the kiss that would eventually come. I remember the tip of his toung caressing my bottom lip, our breaths becoming one as he placed one of his hands in the small of my back and the other covered my cheek, but I did not need to hold on to him, gravity was enough this time.
It’s a shame, you know? Internally, I always used to gloat in the fact that I would enjoy a kiss no matter who it came from. It was a nice way to live, a fair way of smiling every now and then, but now I can’t even do that. Because I want more than a random pair of lips, I want yours.
I want both your hands covering my hips, your nose brushing my forehead as I lift my head and lock my eyes in yours, my arms around your neck and my smile expressing every I love you I didn’t get the chance to say. I want that desperation that comes every time our lips brush but one of us backs out as to torture the other and prolong the rush that makes mine bones feel soft. But it’s totally worth it, you know? Because when our mouths finally meet and I get to capture your lower lip between mine, I can feel every cell of my body shouting out your name. I want those soft kisses that are the preamble for what it’s about to come, your toung invading my mouth, your heavy breaths crashing against my jaw and your fingers trying to climb beneath my skin. Because then and there I feel the urge to grasp every inch of you I can get my hands on, to let myself go in your embrace and stand on the tip of my toes, reducing any kind of distance there could possibly be between us.
And finally I close my eyes a little tighter and let go of one deep breath because I can’t help it: I shiver. I linger in your arms and feel delicate in your embrace. And before I realize it, I can no longer stand in the tip of my toes and my heel must touch the ground because I feel my knees trembling.

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